Jessica and Jane.
Jessica and Jane each relate to self-awareness differently.
Jessica has an experience and her default response is to look outside of herself.
She believes everything happens for a reason. And she creates her reasons... she always has.
She says that Bobby didn't take care of the sales process and that's why the project failed.
She says her best friend Ashley didn't call her back and that's why she ended up not doing anything Friday night.
She says her business partner didn't speak up when a critical part of the project needed to be discussed and that's why the deadline was missed.
Jessica's default response is to create reasons outside of herself.
She finds peace in this certainty.
Jane, on the other hand, has a different relationship with self-awareness.
Instead of looking outside of herself, Jane looks within.
Jane asks herself questions like, "What could I have done to help Bobby with the sales process?"
Or instead of waiting for her best friend to call, she decides to call her best friend wondering how things are with her.
Or instead of saying her business partner didn't speak up, she asks her business partner questions to understand how the project is doing.
Jessica is like most people. Most people believe they are self-aware. Studies show a fraction of people actually are.
The studies go like this...
Someone says they believe they have a high degree of self-awareness.
Then they describe themselves by answering a handful of questions.
Then family, friends, colleagues, and partners, are asked the same questions about said person.
And the results show a stunning gap between the person who says they are self-aware versus how other people see them.
But that's beside the point... let's put this aside.
What does someone get when they "say they are self-aware" versus someone who lives a life always "building self-awareness"?
The first person, who believes they are self-aware, can build self-awareness slower than someone who is always building self-awareness.
It's like saying you're good at math. If you're good at math, and your identity is tied to being good at math, the opportunity to improve lessens.
I invite you to get honest.
Which person are you?
